Brian and I met with the neurosurgeon the other day. We went expecting to find out when my surgery would be and exactly what it entailed. We got neither.
What we did get was good news: I didn't need surgery just yet. Maybe not for a very long time. This guy thinks my pain is being caused, not by the tumor living in a sea of nerves in my back, but by a pelvis out of whack.
I have to take pain medicine to drive, and Brian doesn't drive too well so I took a vicodin before I drove downtown. This got me there without pain, but it also made my inner gears not move so fast. I couldn't wrap my head around this, how is my pain going to stop? Who is going to make this all better? Brian and the doctor seemed to speak the same language so while time was moving at a snail pace for me, they were mapping out a strategy.
I will head to physical therapy and see if that alleviates my discomfort. I was not anxious for surgery, I don't like pain, and relying on others and all that surgery entails. But, if I'm being honest, having someone else do the work and fix me held some appeal. I would have probably been at the same PT place afterwards,and in quite a bit of new pain. I could see this when I took off my rose colored glasses, but the original pain would be gone. Of course as the doc described the surgery so many more things could go wrong I switched gears and embraced the new working theory: my pelvis is out of whack and physical therapy will get it back in place. I have to go for another MRI in 3 months to see how the tumor is growing, it will have to come out when it reaches a certain size. But there is a chance I might live a very long life and die a natural death before that happens. I like that.
And even in the the few days since I met with this doctor I have had numerous offers and guffaw presented methods to fix my pelvis. Hey, yeah, thanks for that.
So, off I go to work this new theory. I never have been to Physical Therapy before so I have no idea what to expect. This should be an adventure.