Secret Language Of Boys

I sipped the warm, creamy brown beverage of the gods, and the coffee did it's job. Head clearing. Vision focused....(I do NOT have a caffeine problem, shut up!)

I was saying....As my coffee helped me ease into the day I surveyed the house. Dishes filled the sink, dishwasher waiting to be emptied; backpacks and coats and various mystery items identified the debris field of Friday's Apres School Couch Crash. Dust had settled over every surface matting the shine. I never did get around to cleaning the bathrooms yesterday, and there were several loads of laundry in various stages of completion.

The place was a mess.

Someone was going to have to clean this.

Then the boys skidded into my view.

"Mom! Can we  go to McDonalds for breakfast!?"

"Can we make smoothies later?"

I smiled the smile of a mom who just realized that the path to obedience is lined with food and a minivan. My eyebrow went up as I realized a way to seal the deal.

"Sure. I'll take you, but when we get back you have to help me get this house clean."

"Will you make a chore chart so we can X out stuff?"

"Yeah! Tape it on the wall!"

Where did these kids come from? I looked in my coffee mug and took a sniff...just coffee.

"Sure."

20 minutes, 4 breakfast burritos and three hashbrowns later, we were taping the chore chart to the wall, and assigning tasks.

I like to think that I am not much of a cusser. I like to think that cussing isn't necessary. But I know that sometimes, it adds just enough ooomph to drive a point home. THIS was one of those times.

"Boys! Let's make this house our bitch!"

Three knuckle punches and we were off!

Two hours later, my house was really clean.

Thirty minutes after that we were making pineapple smoothies.

And and  hour after *that* I had to tell Noah to stop saying," Mario. Luigi. Prepare to become my bitch!"

His language might be dirty, but my floors are clean!