Saturday, May 19, 2012

Chchchchanges...

Last week I took what felt like a big step. I wrote my final regular post on the site that has been very kind to me for the past couple-plus years, M2MKC ( That link will take you to my final post). I had thought about it for a very long time, weighed everything that I have going on in my life and made the decision.

When I found out that one of my friends would be taking the spot, I was so thrilled for her. It wasn't that long ago that I was in her (writing) shoes and the exposure a spot like that gets is invaluable in so many ways. And her name is Susan! It's still Susan Saturday!

But I wasn't sure how I would feel when I saw someone in "my" spot. I do have a touch of competitiveness, would I feel that way toward someone I am supportive of?I would hate myself if I did so I was worried about hating myself.

Friday, after recording a podcast, and taxiing kid to baseball I had a moment of panic that I was missing a deadline. But no, I wasn't. I used the extra time to work on another project that I have mid-completion.

Saturday morning I  sat down at my computer, took a deep breath and clicked. And felt.....happy. Happy for the other Susan. Happy for the mutually beneficial arrangement she and this site that I feel loyal to now have. I feared ugly emotions, and got beautiful ones.

This past week I have gotten some notes from people asking what my plans are. I was touched, but not ready to share because I don't have anything to share. Nothing concrete anyway. But I know this: I am in need of something substantial and am willing to do the work to make it happen.

Whatever "it" is.

Change is in the air, but still off in the distance. I'm ready for it, though.

Go check out the other Susan's blog!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

"...and it was still hot."

So...I gave in to curiosity and read 50 Shades of Grey. (More on that another time) (maybe)

ANYWAY...I read it, now I see it everywhere. Which is, mostly, not terrible- usually it's kind of giggle inducing (the most wonderful sound on earth, right? Yeah, you read it, too, I can tell).

Every time I take a sip of wine, I think,"it's crisp and sweet".

If I have to kneel on the floor for something (like to clean out under the sofa), I stop, put my hands on my thighs, lower my head and then I giggle because I am alone and look like an idiot.

When I'm doing the laundry, and get to my delicates, I almost hurl thinking of someone sniffing them. On purpose. Gigglehurl.

I giggle because I am immature like that.

Today, with the passing of Maurice Sendak, I took out my copy of Where the Wild Things Are.


The copy that I own was the copy that my mother read to my brothers and me as kids. When I moved out of my folks house as an adult, I swiped it along with a couple of other beloved children's book - Trumpet of the Swan, Charlotte's Web, Peter Pan, Jonathan Livingston Seagull (don't judge). When I had children of my own many years later, these are the copies that I shared with them (and will lock up when they move out of the house- Nuts. Tree. Fall.)

I took out the thin book with the sleeping Beast and the tiny sailboat on the cover, and marveled that it had survived all these years. It may be a first edition, I can't tell, but it was written the year I was born and Mom was really into books. I could see her getting it as soon as she heard about it. The edges are a little worn, but no pages are ripped. It's a miracle, really. Six childhoods, almost 50 years and no ripped pages?

I sat down to read it, thinking about what a gift this story was. How Max getting into trouble, being sent to his room  for being naughty,and escaping via his imagination mirrored many a night in my own early life.

How Mom still loved him when he returned.

I read the book this morning and got misty imagining Mr. Sendak writing the story. I looked at the illustration detail of the Wild Things, and smiled at the innovation for the times.

And then I read the last sentence and cursed myself for reading 50 Shades of Grey. There are so many good books out there, and this is what I chose to spend my reading time on? I chose to put the details of 50 Shades into my brain along with such cherished memories like the ones surrounding all my childhood favorite literary memories?


I really am an idiot.


So today I am filling it with good things that have already been written, spoken, filmed. And then I will let my brain speak to me through my fingers and see what happens. My only hope is that there is more good in there than not.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

..and now a word from Klout

I have said it before: I don't get Klout. 

Sure, I sort of  understand it, I just don't see a purpose for it in my life. I have a profile and sometimes I will check it, but honestly, I don't play the Klout game. I don't give +K to other people, mostly because I am never on there. I never invite friends, rarely play around with the tools and understand about half of what the stats show.

I also am not as prolific a social media poster as some, so my score and reach will always be limited. I'm fine with that, not competitive about it and really I only am on there for one main reason.

Sometimes the stuff Klout tells me that I am influential in makes my freaking day. Today I saw this:


Nice guess, Klout. If I am on the internet, I MUST be influential in cats. It's a requirement. And not even, cats...but with a capital C- Cats. All formal like.

I don't have a cat. I am highly allergic to cats, so much so that I can't even go to some people's very clean houses because of one cat. (And, FYI, putting the cat in the bathroom/bedroom/basement makes no difference to cat allergy sufferers. The stuff is in the air, no matter how often you vacuum. There isn't anything you can do. But thank you for trying.)

When we have home shopped, and the place is vacant, I had to lay on the carpet to see if I had a reaction before we would sign on the dotted line.

Cats crap in my flowerbeds and dig up my bulbs attempting to hide said crap.

I can't stand cats.

So, saying I am influential in cats cracks me up.

Although not as much as the second thing I am most influential in (according to Klout): 

I laughed about that one a while back. Ok, yeah, I sort of have a little pride in that one.

But the list is 11 items long! What's on the list? After those three:

Football? I can't stand football! If I was influential  in it at all, there would be NO football. And Texas teams? Huh what? I have never lived in Texas and if I had to pick a favorite team, it would be the Patriots- who are not on the list because I never talk football. Ever. OK, sometimes I do...to say I don't like it.

I have to say, the end of the list kinda stings:




After football, which I can't stand, comes family and blogging. The two things that if asked, I would like to think that I knew a little about.

Sigh.
Giggle.

After vodka, cats and football  Klout thinks I am influential in things that I actually care about.

That makes me laugh at Klout.

(And at the smartasses who +K me in stuff. Thank you for the laugh! You are my people!)